* Inside Out *

 

Rewatched Inside Out and I noticed that the adults did not have Joy as the leader in their headquarters. Okay, after I typed it out only I noticed: HEADquarters. Lol.

Inside Out is not in my top list of Pixar movies, but it does present the the mind of teenager accurately. Everything is bonkers in there - no one is in control. Your personalities all crumble, core memories do not shape you anymore...like a bug in a software. Do you remember your transition period?

For me, I started high school optimistically (like I always did during those days...) with high hopes of finding new friends and adventures. But, what did I get? Cold looks from the whole class when I actually raised my hand to answer a question. More cold looks when I aced my English test. More cold looks as I talk to boys. Just cold looks after cold looks after cold looks like I was an alien.

I did not fit in, enough said. The convent-ness in me was too much for this sekolah agama. Went into form 2, tried a new strategy: just stay quiet and stay low. BUT an English teacher decided to make English fun and I COULD NOT RESIST. One time, we had to sing in front of the class (remember ini sekolah agama ye, kawan-kawan) and I actually went up there and sang...Drop Of Jupiter by Train. Only the bridge part, of course. Someone sang Eminem's Stan. A guy sang Westlife. More cold looks, especially from the girls. I also met another otaku during that time. More cold looks. Congratulations, Farah Nazneen. By the end of the year, when everyone was choosing a deskmate, I decided to leave it to fate. I remember surrendering so bad.

Form three. Met my bestfriend forever (still friends until now!), Life was good. We had the same passion for public speaking. Hated boys (but secretly love them lol). Then the most annoying person arrived; this boy with such an emo face, carrying a big bag, sulking when the teacher introduced him. I remember thinking, "What the heck is wrong with this dude?!" Even back then he managed to annoy me so bad. So, introducing to you, the first moment I met my husband. Ha.

I went from happy lovey-dovey boy band songs to rock songs. From optimistic to being caution. From wanting to meet everyone to just being by myself. From wanting to ace everything to not care about grades to just feel something, you know? I remember being a total nerd obsessing with Harry Potter and The Lord Of The Rings at home but I could not reveal that at school. There was a certain standard to maintain in high school. My favourite book was Like The Red Panda because I thought it GETS ME, you know? Oh how amazing I survived all that.

All in all, being a teenager was super hard. Inside Out managed to present that perfectly.